Lady Clown Shoes

Lady, your boyfriend is a douche bag

What baffles me is that you know this

You know and are not bothered at all

In fact,

you appear

to revel in his toolish behavior

Lady, your boyfriend's existence is an

affront to all of my sensitive senses

You are either indifferent or psycho

In fact,

you appear

to be an enabler of his tantrums

Bridges burns so easily these days

You will not

live forever

nor will you

ever live down this heinous offense

This is not a True Blood marathon

You're no vampiric fashion maven

Yes, you're hot enough to make all

the frat-fucks at the bar howl nightly,

but alcohol isn't getting any cheaper

I made you a one-time offer, dear

You shunned me almost instantly

Well, the company you now keep

makes you guilty by association

Congratulations, Lady Clown Shoes

Don't call me

when he stops calling you

anything but "fetch me the remote"